7 Rules of Dating From a Serial Dater

I’m no dating expert (I don’t even know what qualifies someone as a dating expert) but I decided to put together a list of dating tips. Keep in mind these rules are according to the rules that I’ve made up my mind

 

  1. If I’m not married I’m single
  2. Us going on 1 or a few dates doesn’t equate to were dating/in a relationship. Until we are exclusive, I can date multiple men at the same time
  3. Social Media- No I’m not on Instagram or Twitter. I’m not sharing my social media platforms this is were I vent and share my random thoughts. You having my Instagram is like you having a playbook on all things Lovely  
  4. Traditional rules of dating still apply –ask me out, have a plan, open doors & pull out chairs
  5. No chain food restaurants – really it's just a matter of preference I don’t like chain food restaurants and prefer to dine where linens and silverware on the table . This has nothing to do with $200 dates 
  6.  Lets ease into texting. All out conversations cannot done by text. I need to hear your voice and to know that you can hold a conversation
  7. We will be putting our conversation skills to work- a little small talk,  you ask a question, you allow me to answer, I ask a question and so on.  And PLEASE Keep up with trends and current events so we will have things to talk about. That means READ! For me there’s nothing sexy than a man that reads and can hold a conversation. 

Truth Moment- It’s been a while since I’ve met anybody new. I get in these bouts where I’m out being social in hopes of meeting somebody and then I get turned off by the whole dating/meeting somebody thing. By society's standard something must be wrong with me to be 31, single (never married) no children but me I like to think I have a couple more years before I start hyperventilating ……maybe or maybe not

Come to think of it I know a lot of former 31 yr old who are in their 40’s now still single (never married) no children who regret that they didn’t make a bigger effort in meeting someone or being more sociable. Lots of regrets and a whole lot of shoulda, woulda, coulda. I’m vowing to make a bigger effort on my part. I’m getting back in the dating game I’ll be sure to keep you updated.

P.S. I’m just going to put it out there, I’m open to blind dates


Apparently He Didn't Know...

Navigating the dating world leaves me with many questions. Questions like: Why did he say that? What did he mean by that? Does this mean that he’s interested or not interested?  Who initiated our last conversation, is it my turn to call? 

So many questions that I decide to put together list of moments that left me saying hmmmm…….. Maybe he didn’t know  

A little bit of insight into my world as a single women:

Apparently he didn’t know when getting to know me good morning texts mean nothing without a follow-up of genuine conversation. 

Apparently he didn’t know when you only call me on the drive to or from work, I understand that you are only talking to be because you are free to talk. You are not making time for me. 

Apparently he didn’t know when I say Goodnight at 2:15 pm that mean you just said something wrong. You done messed up buddy!

Apparently he didn’t know hitting is a good thing. Hitting or touching while I’m laughing  is my way of telling you that I’m interested. This is for all the brothers who say they are clueless to if a woman is interested.

Apparently he didn’t know liking all me selfie’s on IG leaves me saying what??? Is that your way of telling me that you like me?  Send me a DM next time telling me: I would like to take you out sometime, when are you free?

I know I’m not the only one experiencing these situations. What didn’t your partner or husband know? Or maybe it was you that that didn’t know something. Tell me about it.

Apparently You/He/She /We Didn't Know………….


Am I Wrong When I Say I don't Want to be a Baby Mama?

Do your girlfriends get offended when you say that you don’t want to be a baby mama???

I often get asked when I'm going to have children and my answer is always the same. 

A few weeks ago a friend of mine asked me when I am going to have some babies and without thinking twice I gave my usual response "When a find a good man, I don't want to be a baby mama."

Once I said it her whole demeanor changed. That's when it dawned on me. She's a baby mama. She's not the confrontational type so we didn’t get into the particulars nor did I try. Honestly, I didn’t know how to explain myself without things going left.

I didn’t mean to offend her nor did I think my comment had anything to do with her and her situation. It had everything to do with what I want and see for my life. 

Love, Marriage & Baby Carriage---everything in due time.

If for some reason things don’t work out that way or in that order then fine but I’m not going to go out of my way to interrupt this fairy tale. 

I’m 30 and single with no prospect in sight so it does seem like a fairy tale but not one that I’m willing to give up on anytime soon.

I don't think anyone knowly signs up to be a baby mama (an unwed mother) Its something that happens and  you deal with it as best you can.  Am I wrong when I say I don't want to be a Baby Mama?

Why's It Got To Be Complicated???

Apparently Facebook forgot a few of the relationship statuses. Forget Single, in a relationship, married, engaged, and its complicated.

These are the people that I’ve been running into:

Emotionally Unavailable – I’m not in a good situation, I’m still hung up on my ex. I live and breathe for the moment they post something on social media 

Meantime Relationship - You’re the guy /girl I’m with till I meet my Mr./Ms. Right

I’m somebody’s Baby daddy, Baby Mama - I have a child/children they are not the issue but my baby daddy and baby mama may have an issue with you because we’re dating. The drama doesn’t bother you does it? Lets just focus on our Love

Auditioning Life Mates - I’m not dating to date I’m dating in search of a life mate, sooner rather than later please

Virgin Territory - I’ve never been in Love, never been in a relationship I have no idea how this is going to work so bear with me

Sex Please - I just want my way with you and will then move on to the next contestant.

3 Dates - After three dates of wining and dining you and being a sheep in wolves clothing I want your panties at your knees 

Emotional Roller Coaster - I’m on an emotional roller coaster right now I don’t know if I’m coming or going but I’m willing to date. Care to join me for the ride? 

God Will Answer My Prayers - I’m hoping/praying for the next relationship to fix everything that’s wrong in my life 

Lets Hang Out - I want sex, with no strings attached

Romantically Challenged - I fall in love, quick and hard and oh yeah P.S. I don’t know how to show love

Did I miss any? I’m still single, I’m sure I will run into others. I will be sure to keep you updated. Who have you meet on the dating scene?