Being Mary Jane Scares Me

Since the Being Mary Jane series debuted.  A couple of different people, friends, acquaintance and family included have said that I remind them of Mary Jane. All I knew about Mary Jane at the time is that on the show Mary Jane knowingly sleeps with a married man so I didn’t take it as a compliment.

I’ve finally caught up on all the episodes, this current season included. The episodes affect me emotionally and I have to be honest with myself and say... Mary Jane & I do share many similarities and that scares the hell out of me.  

1.     I love a good quote! Self Talk, Inspirational Quotes are a part of my daily life

2.     My life is centered around my profession/career – This seems to be the only area in my life that I have some type of control over

3.     I’m an Enabler / I Like Being Right

4.     Sex Toys – I’m a fan! I’m a single girl in my 30’s, not in a committed relationship what do you want from me?  For me, this is the best form of safe sex.

5.     No Boundaries with money. No husband or children of my own. I’m the person people come to first with their money issues

6.     “One Day you're going to actually believe that you the baddest chick in the game like you report to be” This was never an issue for me till I dealt with depression (that’s another blog post). Coming out of the depression I still have my moments of doubt

7.     Soap Box-No judgment here but I’m always ready to get on my soap box

 8.     Being single forever haunts my thoughts- As much as I love myself, and have learned to be happy alone, these thought creeps up

9.     In search of closure –So glad that I learned in my late 20’s that the closure I was searching for would have to come from within. Still have my moments but AMEN for small victories  

10.  In my early 30’s I may have visited a few single adoption sites and looked into egg freezing

11.  Holding on to someone who Isn’t available—I too have a David (nothing sexual and he’s not married but we're still good friends)

12.  Enjoying the company & penis of a man without actually wanting more from the man... enough said

Really now that I think about it I could go on and on about my MJish qualities.

I’m 31, so it’s still early (in my mind) but I do have my what if?? Moments.  But I’m not going to totally be a negative Suzy, I’m making the best use of my time traveling, working on myself, and becoming the type of women I would want to marry.  I will continue watching Mary Jane while also not letting society’s timeline put on more added pressure  (my mother included)